June 15, 2014

If You’re a Nice Guy, Please Read This.

It’s fine.

I know what you’re thinking. Nice guys finish last. Nice guys get trampled on, cheated, and end up getting the short end of the stick.

It’s alright.

It’s difficult to always feel these things and you could easily say that you want to just unleash the fury and be an asshole for once.

But the funny thing is, you can’t. Despite your attempts to not be nice, you end up doing nice anyway. Why? Because being nice is a physiological desire to you. Being nice is not a switch that you can turn on or off in an instant. It is part of who you are. To not be nice is to be you. And you know you can’t be someone you’re not.

Being nice can be a burden. You end up making a decision because it’s a nice decision, right or wrong be damned. You become afraid of hurting other’s feeling because that’s not nice. So you go out of your way to do something to make others feel better. You may compromise yourself in the process, but you assure yourself, “Well, others aren’t angry at me. Things don’t look that bad to me.”

Spineless. Weak. You may have heard these words hurled at you because you’re nice. I’m telling you right now that being nice demands a different kind of strength that others take for granted. When people see a nice guy, they see a pushover. But what they don’t see is that, after years of hardships caused by you being nice, you still are. You’re not a pushover. In fact, while people keep pushing you, you still manage to maintain your balance and continue standing.

If you’re looking for a cure or a way out, then I’m telling you now that there isn’t. Instead, I offer you these words:

You have to be okay.

This is not a pessimistic statement, nor a sad resignation towards your fate. These are the words that you must hold on to in order to make sense of everything. You can quit and just shut yourself from the world. Press the reset button, if you will. But you’re nice. There’s no reset button for that.

You have to be okay.

If you’re not okay, then you’re betraying the very fabric of your existence. You deny yourself from feeling the beauty that is out there. You deprive yourself from living your life to the fulfilling. And that’s not nice.

You have to be okay. Because being nice is okay. Don’t let people make you think otherwise. Admit to yourself these things and just be nice in the best way you can possibly be.

posted from Bloggeroid

2 Comments on “If You’re a Nice Guy, Please Read This.

July 10, 2014 at 7:21 am

very well said Mr. Benitez.

Arif Hossain
September 9, 2015 at 1:01 am



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