The Wedding

After exhausting months of preparation and headaches to endure that started at the beginning of the year, I finally got married on November 28, 2013 to the only woman I’ve shared my life with and will share for all eternity.

November 27

There’s a misconception that weddings are women’s domain. Much of the event will depend on what the bride wants. While I don’t completely disprove of this idea, it is not entirely true, either. Wedding is just as important for grooms to put their imprint on the most special day of their lives.

A wedding can be a reflection of your own life captured in a nutshell with your family and friends as witnesses. It is a celebration of your own blood and tears spent to not just build and develop a relationship into something more meaningful, but to also show the person you have become through the years with the help of the people around you who have made everything possible.

The choices made for the wedding, from the suppliers down to the themes and motifs, reflect the kind of person my wife and I are – total contrasts both in character and upbringing, yet ultimately loving, understanding, and passionate.

My wedding with the person I loved helped me keep my feet grounded and my head held up high. The night before the wedding has made me realize how lucky and grateful I am. With the support I have received from my family through the good and bad, the childhood friends I’ve grown up and still share moments with, and even my past co-workers, classmates, and acquaintances whom I learned to cherish, this is honestly an unbelievable life I’ve had.

I’ve sent my thanks to everybody who has become part of my life that evening. It is humbling, cathartic, and overwhelming to think that, years ago, I spent all my time locked up in my room, searching for heavy metal song to download on our computer, playing guitar until I fall asleep with my hands still clutching the instrument, and shutting out all this possibility of awesomeness to happen. Throughout the years, I have learned to experience things I never dared to experience when I was younger because they were out of my comfort zone. And it was beautiful and I want more – I wanted to build a life not just for myself, but also for the people I truly care about. And this realization will culminate the very next day.

Of course, life has its moments of discombobulated madness, which is why friends exist. They went over to spent the night at the hotel room I was staying. Booze wasn’t flowing, but it was present as always. We sipped and drank into the evening recalling the times that seemed to have flown by our heads. It’s amazing that the immaturity, shouting, screaming, in-fighting, and drinking alcohol up until the morning has kept us together all this time.

November 28

My hands were cold and clammy. They only stopped sweating when the wedding was done, but I don’t want to get ahead of myself.

While trouble usually arises during the final hours of wedding preparations, my wife and I encountered no such thing. You could say we prepared well for it. Scratch that, she prepared for our wedding (my wife’s event coordination skills and obsessive-compulsiveness were put into good use, especially covering up the many mistakes I made months before the wedding). It also helped that we had a on-the-day wedding coordinator who helped us with aligning the suppliers whom we hired for the event.

Father and son moment.

I hate taking photos, to be honest. But for the sake of the wedding, I simply had to take a proverbial bullet for the team. It turned out well since I loved the suit that was tailor-made for me. It is the first time that I was proud of myself wearing something so formal. Maybe it’s because I got used to the shirt-shorts-slippers combination I wear all the time that everything outside those lines of clothing is haute couture. I still look stupid on the on-site video that was shown during the wedding.

Upon arriving at the church with my family, I greeted all the guests from both sides as humanly possible and thanked them for attending the event. Seeing guests from all corners of the church pumped me up so much that it got me nervous. Nothing really prepares you for this until it’s happening at the moment.

I was holding back my tears for the very same reason as the night before while waiting before the altar for my soon-to-be-wife to enter. I really can’t believe this is happening. Never in my life have I thought that I’ll get married to the most beautiful woman I’ve known with my loving family by my side. It is surreal, to say the least.

The moment the church doors opened was just glorious. I have always believed in my better half as the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, but I have never witnessed such grace and elegance from her with her wedding gown on as she walked down the aisle. Instead of shedding tears, I was overwhelmed with happiness to have this woman, whom I’ve spent more than five years of my life, to finally accept me to become her partner.

This was made even more evident during her wedding vow. It is the most sublime piece of writing that was read to and written for me, but even words won’t do justice in describing it.

The wedding was like shoegaze music, a dreamlike blur that only happens in your wildest dreams. The priest spoke a very introspective and philosophical sermon about marriage as a partnership and being one while both maintain separate identities. Everything else was pretty by-the-number in terms of how weddings are supposed to go, but the natural high of being at the center of the moment with my wife continued to kicked in even late in the evening.

The reception capped off the festivities with a bang. We had our surprise dance number, ate cake, had like a thousand pictures with our photographers with my cheeks strained by the constant smiling, broke bank during our money dance, barely ate our food, shook hands and kissed cheeks, watched a really awesome on-site video prepared by our videographer, more weird dancing from me, fun times with my childhood friends, and copious amounts of draft beers that was constantly refilled by our head waiter for the evening. It was spiraling down into this wonderful that you didn’t want to end.

11 PM

But it did, eventually.

My wife and I packed all the gifts and wedding materials with the help of the van that was available to us that evening and headed back to the hotel room. In my mind, I can’t help but feel excited for our first day together in our journey as a married couple.

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Christopher Jan Benitez

Freelance writer and content marketer by profession. CEO of GoSmrk, a boutique digital agency that focuses on helping online businesses by using the latest and best growth hacking techniques. Magical Tumbong is a place where he vents out about non-work related matters.

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